Neil Webb writes exclusively on Hob Nob Anyone?

Readers please forgive me.
I am a crazy wild beast frothing at the mouth . The slightest provocation will turn me into a lunatic ready to wreak devastation. And the reason that I am, as our American cousins say, so 'pumped' , is that this week we get the chance to slay the bulls. As I dictate this to my scribe Ben Whitmarsh, I am mincing around the sandy ring that occupies a few acres of my lush grounds in Pangbourne, dressed in my finest Catalonian matador cape. Some would say that I resemble an unconvincing 'Las Vegas' style Elvis impersonator. I say I'm the closest thing to Antonia Banderas in the whole of the damn Thames Valley. If anyone is confused by my ramblings, the bulls I refer to are the bulls of our rivals Oxford......for they are coming to the Madejski Stadium, and I fancy we will slay them.

But before I concentrate on this particular foe, let me talk about the past two games. I particularly enjoyed our thrashing of Yeovil, as it gave me an excuse to celebrate with numerous pints of scrumpy....a seriously underated beverage. It was a professional performance, with the Martin Williams standing out. He has come a long way since the early season 'troubles', and his good form reflects well on the management for getting him to buckle down. It also makes you wonder how bad things were previously for the situation to get so heated.

Onto Brentford, and our 'up and at em, defend in their half' style certainly worked in the first 45 minutes, and was a massive change from the days when the team followed the ways of the Burns. Alan Pardew has every right to feel disappointed that he didn't collect all three points. Andy Gurney's transformation into a goalscoring right midfielder has surprised everyone aswell. Long may it continue. Also, with Sean Evers shining, and Barry Hunter and Linvoy Primus taking no prisoners, things are looking up. Even Graeme Murty's injury isn't as life threatening as past knocks.

One interesting conundrum that will face P and G in the coming weeks is who to play up front. Forster will be back, but Williams is in form, and Keith Scott is a valuable target man. At least its a 'positive' dilemma.

But all of this is just deviating from the main attraction.....on Sunday morning, Oxford will cross the boundary into our beloved Royal County, but they will go home with nothing. This is my confident prediction.....Reading 2, Poxford 0.

Time now for me to go and feed the doberman pinchers on a bit of raw meat. They've been drooling for quite a while over a postman that looks an awful lot like Martin Hicks , and I'm worried if they go for him he'll hoof them over the castle walls.

Webb over and out.

Neil
As perhaps told to Ben Whitmarsh

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